Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
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