Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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