so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Randomize
