Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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