Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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