Did you just see the Batmobile???
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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