People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Randomize
