"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
YOU HAVE PISSED AND FUCKED ON LITERALLY EVERYTHING IN MY HOUSE
Not everything, just a few things. And only a few times. The odds are really not all that bad when you break it down.
you’ve pissed every time you slept over. there’s no such thing as odds anymore. it’s guaranteed
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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