Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
