Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
Randomize
