I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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