Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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