I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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