I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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