I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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