first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize