I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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