I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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