I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
