are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
