I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
Randomize
