talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
