Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
