i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Your dad touched me again.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
