who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
Randomize
