would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
