dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
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