More tranny stories later!
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
