Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
