I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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