What did we do last night that was yellow?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
