I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
