the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
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