My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
I wear drunk well.
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