I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Randomize
