problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
He uses pillows to masturbate.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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