the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
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