why didn't you poke me back
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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