I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
