I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Dicks are not precious.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
