That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
You can kiss the security deposit goodbye after you and your boyfriend did donuts on his moped in the middle of the apartment. It was impressive since you were both too drunk to walk.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
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