dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
