Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
