She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
