You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
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