they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
