I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize