I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
