DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
