I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
Randomize
