Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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